We’ve all seen the signposts telling us that we’re about to
turn onto such and such street. In sprawl U.S. of A., the streets are often
named after the trees that were felled/cleared to make way for ribbons of
sphalt, McMansions and turf farms (and lookie younder at the three-car garage).
Well, instead of such monikers as “Maple Street,” “Pine Circle,” “Hemlock Avenue” and “Oak
Hill Drive,” lets convince the sprawl developers to name their streets in
keeping with what really happened.
So, here are my choices for street names for the next sprawl
debacle coming soon to a municipality near you: Clearcut Avenue, Logjam Street,
Bulldozed Acres Circle, Wildlife Gone Avenue, Carbon Footprint Beltway, Turf
Farm Alley, Chainsaw Boulevard, 3-lane Court, Congestion Highway, Engine Idling
Motorway, and Backhoe Drive.
Suggestions welcome
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